I have a fetish about old women's magazines. (I mean that the magazines are old, not the women.) I've just bought a job lot of 1973/4 Family Circles from eBay and it really stands out how weight loss was a major concern by then, whereas the only concession to dieting in my 1967 edition was a 4-page spread entitled “Summer’s here - it’s time for cottage cheese!”
From tapeworm pills to now, diets have always been as whimsical as fashion. The 1970s, if my trusty periodicals are to be believed, were all about meal replacement. A particularly dodgy-looking product called Bisks were heavily advertised (although perhaps not that bad, looking at their recipe section: kidney stroganoff, anyone?)
The 80s were all about fibre, before people realised that All-bran is less tasty than the box it comes in. In the 90s you couldn't turn on daytime TV without Rosemary Conley prancing about in a leotard, extolling the virtues of complex carbohydrates. Dr Atkins changed all that in 2003 with his high-protein, zero-carb regime, and overnight farm animals began to look a bit worried.
Currently, the 5:2 diet is all the rage. The idea is that you eat normally for 5 days a week then <500 calories on the other two. I can see the logic, but as I'm nicknamed The Incredible Sulk because of how bad-tempered I get when hungry, it’s probably not for me lest I lose my husband along with the extra poundage.
Gregg Wallace, the shouty barrow-boy from Masterchef, is currently being paid £££ to advertise Weightwatchers. Of course he is really on the heartbreak diet, considerably more effective than spending two hours a day calculating points to see if you can afford a sneaky Jaffa cake after tea.
~ remember that nobody but you cares, or even particularly notices, how much you weigh. (Well, your spouse might, but they swore “for better for worse” so tough.)
~ use optical illusion to your advantage. If you only have your photo taken next to big round things, like bulls or hay bales, you will look comparatively thinner. Why not keep a deflated beach ball in your handbag just in case?
~ buy clothes one size bigger and cut the labels out. Then go and have a biscuit.
No comments:
Post a Comment